Juli / August 2 0 0 8

Keine Urlaubsreise heuer - einerseits, weil wir voriges Jahr viel unterwegs waren, andererseits, weil in Baden eine  Wohnung im zweiten Stock renoviert werden muss (und das sehr ausgiebig) und wir deshalb anwesend sein müssen. Als Ersatz für ein Reisetagebuch sammle ich Tagebuchnotizen und Auszüge aus Emails.

"... Wir sind den ganzen Sommer am Berghof und in Baden. Unsere Jungen sind vom 6. bis 13. Juli am See in Podersdorf; sie haben einen Wohnwagen gemietet. ... Sind bereits seit 28.6. am Berghof, allerdings mit der Unterbrechung von zwei sehr intensiven Arbeitstagen am 3. und 4. in Baden. Geniese es heuer eigentlich sehr, keine größeren Urlaubsvorbereitungen treffen zu müssen, Anreisen in Kauf zu nehmen, etc. Wir waren ja voriges Jahr viel weg und ich muss sagen, das Fliegen ist mir momentan verleidet - diese Massenabfertigung, diese unzähligen Sicherheitschecks, die Tatsache, dass man sich immer öfter selbst einchecken muss, die überfüllten, ungemütlichen, teilweise unappetitilichen  Lokale auf den Flughäfen, dieser geradezu hysterische Anti-Raucher-Terrorismus (die Krönung bisher: in Heathrow 2 Glaskobeln unter 20 bis 40 mit ständig laufendem Motor wartenden Taxis)! Gut, in dem Fall geh ich einfach nicht rauchen. Aber mir geht die institutionalisierte Beklugscheißerung derart auf die Nerven ... ich könnte manchmal zerspringen vor Wut. Immer mehr werden die, die mit Sachen wie Tabakrauchen oder alkoholischen Getränken umgehen können, wegen derer, die das nicht können, gegängelt und schikaniert! Außerdem bin ich der Meinung, dass die Bevormundung, auch zum Nutzen der Betroffenen, demokratisch unvereinbar ist und gesellschaftspolitisch gefährlich. Je mehr selbsternannte Autoritäten das "Deckelchen" auf ihren Mitbürgern draufhalten, desto größer werden die destruktiven Energien, die sich darunter sammeln. Und was bitte ist ein mündiger Bürger, der seinen Vertreter wählt und bezahlt und von ihnen dann erzogen wird? Das ist absurd. Übrigens, ich hab mir in Ebay ein paar 4x5 Zoll Farb-Planfilme gekauft (in ebay deshalb, weil sie neu unsagbar teuer sind) und werde mich jetzt an Aufnahmen in Großformat in Farbe wagen. Zwei Aufnahmen habe ich schon gemacht, aber ich bin ein bischen feig, wegen der manuellen Entwicklung (das ATL ist ja in Baden).... "

"... Felix, Katharina and their parents are on Neusiedler See from today (6.Jul) until next Sunday; they rented a (stationary) caravan on the campground in Podersdorf. The parents had it "un-nice" with each other again, resulting in some visible increase in uneasiness in the children. We were on Berghof from 28.Jun to 2.Jul, in Baden on 3. and 4. Jul and are now back on Berghof. We will be in Baden from 14. to 17. Jul again. I enjoy it so much to be away from Baden; it is perfekt holidays without any distance to travel; only the sea is missing or some other considerable chunk of water... "

" ... Everybody's coming back - the young ones from Neusiedler See and we from Berghof. There was thunderstrom yesterday and rain today. The electricity switched of in our flat but not long enough for a problem with the deep freezer. We have a few dates coming week, dentis fx, and will be in Baden til thursday... " 

" ... >>Ich habe die Forumsdiskussion verfolgt, aus welcher Du Dich vergrämt zurückgezogen hast. Kein Wunder, bei diesen komischen Vögeln, die sich (nicht nur) im Netz  herumtreiben. << Ich hab mich gar nicht zurückgezogen, ich hatte nur nichts neues beizutragen. Inzwischen habe ich auch manuell farbentwickelt und werde das demnächst ins Forum stellen. Die in diesem Forum sind ohnehin sehr nett, da habe ich schon ganz anderes erlebt. >>Die Probleme mit dem ATL 1000 hätte ich mir freiwillig nicht aufgehalst. Aber Du hast ja die Nerven und die Ruhe für solche langwierigen Experimentierphasen. << Naja, das wusste ich ja nicht. Ich find's immer noch angenehmer als manuell - wenn's funktioniert. ... wir sind jetzt mehr am Bauernhof und nur dann in Baden, wenn ein Termin ansteht. Komme gerade vom Zahnarzt und muss gleich wieder weg zu einem anderen Termin. Sind von heute bis Donnerstag in Baden. Unsere Jungen waren in der letzten Woche am Neusiedler See. Sie hatten etwas Pech mit dem Wetter, aber es hat ihnen anscheinend trotzdem gefallen... "

(Freitag 18.7.2008) Mit Felix auf den Berghof. Würstl und Bier als Jause beim Kreuzwirt. Mittags Kotellet, Erbsen und Reis. (Samstag 19.7.2008) Einkaufstour nach Böheimkirchen; zuerst zum Hartl, Einkaufskorb, Butterdosen, Mörser, Salatschleuder, etc. Dann Gummistiefel für Felix. Kaffee und Kuchen in einer Bäckerei. (Sonntag 20.7.2008) Spaziergang zum "vis-a-vis Punkt"; Felix geht nur bis zu den Linden mit. Gegen 11h zum Pyringer, Bauernmuseum in Durlas, noch nach dem Nutzhof; Heuerntefest, Otto schuhplattelt. Felix vom Volkstanz fasziniert. 1330 zurück, Julia und Katharina schon da, um Felix abzuholen. ... - Sehr ruhiger Nachmittag; obwohl ich die Kinder so gern habe, ist ihr ewiges Gerede und Aufmerksamkeitheischen überwältigend anstrengend. (Montag 21.7.2008) 2 Farbfilme entwickelt und gescannt; hat von morgens bis nach 3h nachmittags gedauert, hauptsächlich weil das Scannen mit dem Epson 1600 so langwierig ist. Der 2. entwickelte Film ist beschädigt; weiß nicht warum: entweder war das Vorspülwasser mit der Chemie von vorher verunreinigt oder es ist Licht durch den Dosendeckel eingetreten während ich das Zentralrohr holte...

" ... Fotografisch gibt es nicht so viel Neues. Ich habe hauptsächlich Wolken fotografiert - das Motiv ist am Bauernhof sehr zugänglich - und Farbfilme entwickelt; dabei auch gelegentlich was verhaut (sicher mehr, als mir das Fotogeschäft Filme zerkratzt hat); das Gute daran ist, dass ich eine gewisse Routine kriege... "

Lehrerkolleginen von Brigitte

" ... Life here is rather hectic as the renovation of that flat above us is in full swing - much dirt and noise. We have to be in Baden at least some of the time to deal with workers and do some cleaning in the staircase. We came back to Baden on 22nd. The other young ones (ie. Gregor, Ju2 and Niklas) moved flats and we (ie more Brigitte) had Niklas on 3 days - which was rather nice. He did not feel so comfortable here on the first of these 3 days as he had not been here for a long time, but got used to it quickly. Actually Brigitte delt with all if it - baby and workers - as a was rather overwelmed with all this hassel, these people, etc. Also had a big row with my mother again: here sole contribution to the renovation is to annoy the workers giving them good advice and telling them not to make any noise. She always finds reason NOT to do something. Which is strongly built into here personality - she abhorres the finality of something DONE, contrary to improvisation (which is obvously less final). She has turned everything she touched the past 30 years (with the exception of her flat) into a garbage collection or worse. Like her garden which is worse than if she had done nothing - an abominable combination of rubbish and crippled plants. When she told the workers they had to stop then and then I really got at her telling that they are to work until they are finished (for that day) and that she should stop to interfere. Not the first time of a shouting quarrel. After that she disappeared into her flat for 2 days and went to Vienna for the next 2 days - good riddance! - On one hand I am pleased not to have allowed any slowing down of the works (which would make the unpleasantness only longer) on the other hand I really feel unwell when there is an undercurrent of an unresolved conflict. I really <have problems> my mother but I also feel restless and upset when a thing like this is going on. She obviously has still a strong emotional lever on me. We will have Felix and Katharina for 3 days while their mother will be off with a (girl) friend. We also want to visit Alexander and his family (Alexander is a nephew of mine although a year older, the son of my half-syster; he is a lung doctor in Lainz, and exeptionally nice). They have a permanent caravan in Podersdorf on Neusiedler See and spend most summer holidays there. We share an interest in photography and he loves, like me, to endlessly study catalogues and tests before buying some new photographic equipment. I am still at developing colour. I will have to buy another set of chemicals, which means that I have self-developed 24 films now. The results are on average not better than from the shop and I have certainly damaged more films myself and more severly that the few films that have been scratched by the shop (through not properly cleaning the machines). Still, it gives me the feeling of having done it more myself, of having more control (the contrast of the film can be influenced by slight variations in temperature) and have generally widend my perspective and knowledege on photography... "

(31.07.2008) Niklas ist nun ein jahr alt und er hat genau an seinem Geburtstag begonnen zu gehen.

(15.8.2008) " ... We are here on Berghof and in Baden alternatingly. The renovation of the flat in Baden is progressing well; everything very dirty of course, and noise, etc. Felix and company are in Waldviertel - Rainers parents invited them for a week in a farmhouse. It seems that Rainers father is getting a little crazy,. He was to some institution for some weeks for a cure for depression, which went well, maybe too well, because now he seems to have pentuled in the opposite direction - he founded a firm for some obscure reason, he started to organize a "Messe" and he doese strange things like faxing to one of his sons a message to send him his driving license, which he had lost, the son having nothing to do and knowing nothing of the matter. I hope Felix rahter extreme reactions sometimes (he does and his father is said he did bang his head with his fist or against something - not in a way to hurt himself but still ... ; there are also other sign of a manic disposition - overexited, not "reachable") has nothing to do with it.  I did a lot of photography including developing of colour negativ films (with a strain of bad luck as I spoiled a film again, this time because the drum was not closed properly - I scanned this film in black and white so the reddish cast of the light leak does not show, but the picis on that film would have done better in colour - people against green foliage does not show well except the foliage is very dark and the person in the light.)  Re your Bat mizwah : The 4 to 5 hours in a sanctum for superstitions (not matter of what congregation) sounds like the third degree - horrible. I wonder if a walkman helps much and it will just as much hurt your relatives and get you into odds with them (not to talk of Myrtles anger about the walkman and about your comments that will certainly go with it) as if you did not attend, maybe even more so ... not matter how justified, funny and to the point those comments might be.  Something else - I must admit that I like to read a lot of distracting and sometimes entertaining rubbish, between others those "historical" detectiv stories, that are en vogue now. There are a few exceptional goods ones (at the moment I can only think of Robert van Guliks "Judge Di"), many shallow but occasionally entertaining ones (fx. Ellis Peters Cadfael stories) and a lot of stuff that is simply unbearable. I fell into one of the latter, the title is "Der Fluch von Mont St. Michel", the french original "La promesse de l'ange" sounded better and a quick peruse gave me the impression that some of the history of Mont St. Miche might be woven into it. What a heap of cheap cheese! As one can notice nowadays the pendulum of the Zeitgeist is moving back from rationality to superstition again and this book thrives on it. I force-finished it by a lot of diagonal reading but it was a waste of time and money.  Except about robots Isaak Asimov wrote a lot of SF stories around an envisioned science called "psychohistry", a statistical system able to exactly predict the future of mankind (which in these "Foundation" stories has spread all over our galaxy). This psychohistory had enough appeal to interest scientists as well. It also motivated some other SF authors to create themselves stories within the "Foundation" universe. I just finished one, by David Brin, who is, I believe, himselve a mathematician and astronomer. I like Asimov (nowadays more than in younger years) mainly because of his optimistic and positive attitude about the future. I read and reread Asimove's Foundation cyclus - he himselv rearranged his writings in later years so that they better fit together as a series - and also three Foundation books by other authors, but it took me a long time - and this is a grave disappointment - that all these books do NOT constitute an Utopy (which is for me the main duty of SF), but just reiterate motives and methodes found in human history and end in some obscure time-space, where all problems are solved through some mystical property (in the case of the Foundation cyclus it is first an imperium which Asimov built rather closly after the Chinese Empire and the future solution is that all inhabitants of the galaxy turn into mentalists and form a telephatic super entity) ... it turns out rather flat for so many thousands of pages.  We will return to Baden on sunday. For next week Brigitte organized a chidren's event on Berghof, ie. we will have some 4 to 5 children between 3 and 11. Well ... I believe it will be funny .. or so I hope... "

(22.8.08) Die Kinder waren im Waldviertel, auf einem Bauernhof und ua. auch auf einer Dampflokfahrt. Später sind sie und anja und Dominik zu uns auf den Berhof gekommen.

" ... As to Alma: (Mahler-Werfel) friends of us were to an enactment named "Alma". It seems some scenes of her life are played while you sit and eat, etc. as if you were part of the society. I think they (our friends) liked it but it looks to me like an especially useless enterprise. I saw a biogaphical film once and there were only Gropius, Mahler and Werfel as far as I can remember (with Kokoschka going to war, becaus he could not get her). It seems she was attracted to serious and important men. She liked it and they (her men) liked it so I cannot see a problem; many talk her down but I guess most would be fascinated to have important husbands or wives. ... As to our doings: this is the last week before school. Brigittes will do some preparations. I wanted to make a "Klausur", but have to search for some programming solutions which I can better do here than on Berghof. - Last week we had two 4-children days which was ( as Brigitte does most of the work) quite nice. It wa actually not more hassel and unrest than with only our two, as there was a 10 year old nice of Brigitte - Anja - who looked after Katharina. And the 6 year old nephew Dominik gets along very well with Felix. I had more time to read or do some things of my own as if we had had Felix and Katharina alone. I will enter some photographs later the week.

(30.8.2008) Mit Brigitte und den Kindern auf die Ruine Rauhenstein.

(31.08.2008) Besuch der Leutzendorf-Villa in Schönau an der Triesting.

[ENDE]